Bittersweet Reality

by Dr. Noise

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This is the first ever Dr. Noise CD from 2006 which was released independently.


released October 1, 2006

Bill Martin, Justin Bosch (Recording Equipment)



Some rights reserved. Please refer to individual track pages for license info.


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Track Name: Introduction
Track Name: Daydreamer
a calm unending field a place to dreams what's real
as the thoughts flow thru your mind

as the dreamworld fades revelations made
reality enters once again

Once the master of a world
Once I could see the dead
Unhuman displays before my eyes

I brought us all to peace
and never stopped to rest
But something's haunting me
Bittersweet Reality.
Track Name: Fear
The Taste of Blood, I just can't spit it out...
For this is what has Changed me
Knocked on my face, the pain it has disgraced
and I've been bullied once again

Frightening commotion over me as I try to
make my way back to a sense of dignity
The silent moments that I'll have alone in the wake
can not prepare my angered soul...

The fear outreaches and grasps my way of life
a monster on the inside with no way out!

(C)Anyone can see the fear omitting from my eyes
I don't know if I'll break tonight
anyone can see the fear omitting from my eyes
I don't know how I'll break tonight.

I build the strength, defense my only friend
for this is all I know now
I've lost control, the fear I'm not alone
and I've been bullied once again

GO! I musn't hide my
SHAME! I breathe in your de
CAY! Do not want to
DIE! must find my way back
HOME! I musn't hide my
SHAME! I must break away!!!

The fear of all my fears is that I won't be able to get over this
and I have no net.
a Catch 22 a perception I can't reach
Do not think less of me
For I am capable of many things my instincts hidden in my dreams
if only you could if only could see
Do not think less of me
Track Name: Validation
another faceless coming, another overwhelming parasite
our mothers and our fathers, our neihbors all can not decide
People dying in the streets stepping over all the blood
as I decay (wondering what to be)
Believing what you can not feel and dying yet it isso real is it worth it yet?

Killing in the name of christ or perhaps it's just done out of spite welcome ironic decay.

I'm walking out, it's over now
I can see the end, before my time

Another faceless coming, another overwhelming parasite
the activists are calling, calling for a change for right
25 fucking years still don't know why I'm here listening to this...
Fight for something that is real, and validate just why you're here I can't implore this anymore

Half the country can not a tell the truth from a lie
while the half that knows better sits and bitches from up high

Now please don't get me wrong, I don't have the
answer to all that is wrong
but the silence of the world in all it's anger is enough to make me sick.

Now please don't get me wrong, I don't have an answer to all these problems
but the peace for world today doesn't revolve around
this decay

Here I am... dreaming the grass...this is peace
because nobody is left
the bombs killed you... nothing left now.
just memories...just memories of then

A shot goes off again, before my eyes
I see the amber decay, before my eyes
We can not be the best, before our time
Make the best of it, validate your life
Track Name: Anxiety
The peaceful tranquil lullaby
I never ever knew
my soul I want to reveal

My skin is cracking to be shown
my eyes begin to swell
The nerves are winding me down

(R)I am the one who sits and waits alone
as the lessers continue to grow
I work twice as hard and respect I've never earned
petrified to step through

Thrashing thru the lullabies
repeating in my dreams
I wake to a sweating cold felt scream

Thrashing blood across the room
you'd never ever know
as I slip my mask on again

Down Below you never knew
behind this set of eyes
is a future that is so blue

a chance i can not grasp
a chance is what i need
but the greater evil will prevail
in the wake of anxiety

A reign of soverign poverty
an answer hiding in my brain
Track Name: Addiction
I must be going mad, I can not feel from my waist down
A pain surging thru my ability to keep calm
I'm not delusional, it is all so very real
I need this powder or I can not heal

Watch as it spirals thru your mind, you're flying to the sky
No it's it's over again.
The frustration takes my mind, don't read into the signs
There's nothing wrong with me..

(C)I can not stop addiction, I can not stop myself from
feeling a need so powerful now, every single day
I can not stop frustration, the bleeding heart inside me
will cry out for an answer to my

Pray now for me to break off my path of nowhere

Ok So maybe I have a problem and, I need to solve it for the sake
of myself and anyone left who gives a shit
The Rampant motion in my head, the pidder padder of small feet
I can't hear I can't see, Right in front of me

no one can stand the smell of my, clothes or breathe as I walk by
disowned by everyone I ever knew
doing things I'd never do, just for a fix or maybe two
don't judge me for this

Pray now for me to break off of my
path of nowhere heading so fast
a train wreck couldn't stop me from
getting to artificial somber

In a perfect world I will conquer all
can't seem to put a touch on what it was
that made me feel so very cold
where did all the time go?
Another soul saved from a destined fate
another clouded mind is clear of hate
Welcome to my dreamworld where everything
happens just the way it should...

I can't remember you.
Track Name: Greed
So much I have gained...
so much I've lost in time

Monetary life
Momentary silence
for wasted time...

I miss all my friends
my family is gone
They've forgotten me...

So I stand and stare
34th floor glass door
a nameplate on my desk...

I pay for my mistakes
Like I pay for my sex
and material smiles

One more chance I want...
one more chance I need...
it's all about me
Don't forget my name
don't forget my eyes
they stared at you the day
I took your life from you.
Track Name: Interlude
Track Name: Uncertainty
Chilled embrace i simply cant escape you
another demon has been born
i take a look back and i think what now
what now?

moonlight rises and another days over
and yet the demons still alive
I lay awake all night and I think what now?
What now?

I can not rise again with eyes wide open
Questioning (Reflecting) everything I've ever done
A nightly wish it'll pass but how?
I don't know how

I sit in paranoid embrace
and can't help think about my own disgrace

Run the power of the city from my anguish as
tears fall from my eyes
i blackout guarenteed never to arise
The blissful ignorance of all my friends
who say that it will be alright
don't know, don't feel don't see, what now?

I wish for confidence I wish for certainty
I wish to abolish this self doubt that's taking over me
and I can't understand, and I can't make a call and again
once more I cant pull myself off the floor

All torn down
the blame upon myself for all these things
I must tear myself away in reverie
alone i prevail alone I now will see
these drugs they've given me can not stand up to

(C2)The only leaves that I will ever turn over
Reflect the images that I'll never see
I must alone endure the sensation
but how? I don't know how...
Confidence is all I'll ever need.
Track Name: Jealousy
My mind's a blaze of fire
Scathing Thoughts of liars DIE DIE

The things I can not stand without reasons
I demand Control

Without theis beat in my heart
important things I could start to SEE SEE

The thing in which i love is also the thing
that brings me misery

I try to ignore the fire
and build upon myself
all the things i wish I was
what i'm not is my desire
what I wouldn't give to be just like you.

You and your luck with women
your talents, job, I'm dreaming
The children won't laugh if I am just like you

As the playground screams
Fight (chanting) Please stop the screaming

That was the day that I embraced
an anxiety that withered me away
a single blow I wished I'd throw
so my confidence can come back to stay

Turn around, I don't want you to see me
Turn around, embracing what I can not be
Turn around, the fear and anguish leave me weak
Turn around, I can't help hearing your pity

Life yourself up for a day
face your fears ignore self hate
a dying inside shining thru
a jealous anguish loathe self hate